220/ No no No no No

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I am baffled by the amount of men I have come across in my dating fairy tale so far that have been unable or unwilling to end communication in a respectful, grown-up and polite way. Let me first point out that I have been longing for a long-term loving relationship for a couple of years now. So my ‘goal’ so to speak is clear. I’m not looking for a one night stand or a friends with benefits situation. My dating attempts linger around that longing for real love, it was my main reason to keep my eye on the look out.

So, say for example you ‘met’ another person via a dating app and you have been talking with each other for two or three days and it has been pleasant. You even agreed to meet for a coffee and on the morning of the coffee date he cancels it. After I express that this has happened to me a couple of times and I get a little insecure about it, he replies saying he will be in touch to agree on a new date. Guess what, the day after he sends me a photo of himself off to work and I replied to it and after that he never contacted me again. So… OK if you changed your mind, OK if you met someone else you’d rather date, OK if you’re poorly and can’t make it, OK if you just don’t feel like talking anymore, but… just let someone know! Why not just let me know.

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219/ Alien says No

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Are we all doing things and living life according to how we think the world expects us to live? Following the treaded path of school, work, relationships, children etc? Do most of us feel caught up in this matrix that we have all created? Do we feel pressured to follow the ‘rules’, all boxed in and lost? Do we feel stressed, burned out, depressed? Have we forgotten how to spend time with ourselves? Just me, myself and I, without screens, loud chatter and constant input.

I feel we’ve forgotten that we can step out of the box,at any time and listen to ourselves. Become ourselves more each day, it takes practice to find the one we once were. Who were we before we started to run on that gigantic treadmill, before we lost ourselves into this stressful oblivion. Don’t feel pressured into getting children when you feel you want to spend your lifetime on your own development, your broken heart, your lost soul.

Don’t have children if you just want to focus on your dog(s) and love them like they’re your babies. Don’t take that office job that doesn’t suit you if you want to get into a new education or want to travel. Don’t travel around the globe when all you want to do is spend month on your couch with Netflix because it’s what you need. Don’t start a diet and lose yourself in black and white calorie counting when all your body longs for is for you to love and cherish it. Don’t feel pressured to have a boy- or girlfriend if you just want to enjoy fucking around and be free. Don’t put on a dress if you feel like trousers. Don’t hide yourself if you feel you want to shine and don’t put a mask on, faking it till you make it when you really need to just cover your head with the duvet and stay in. Don’t do it if you don’t want to. If it gives you a nagging feeling, an unease and it weighs heavy each time you have to do it: STOP IT. Say No. Practice saying NO. You deserve to walk your own path, you don’t owe anybody anything ♥